St. Paul & Ramsey County
Divorce mediation in St. Paul, without the courthouse fight
A neutral mediator helps the two of you sort out the kids, the house, the money and the debts, and put your decisions in writing, instead of leaving them to a Ramsey County judge.
- $1,695 per person, flat, on Zoom. No hourly billing, no retainer.
- Ryan or Kate. Kate is a Qualified Neutral under Rule 114.
- Three places. On Zoom, a St. Paul-area conference room, or a rented cabin outside the Cities. See all three.
4.9 from 292 Google reviewsBy the Flannel People Mediation team. Updated October 2026. General information, not legal advice. Flannel People Mediation doesn't practice law or give legal advice, and doesn't draft court papers or file anything with a court.
Your court, if you file
St. Paul is in Ramsey County, part of Minnesota's Second Judicial District.
- 4.9 stars
- 292 Google reviews
- $1,695
- per person, flat, on Zoom
- Ryan or Kate
- your neutral mediator
- Free 15 minutes
- to ask your questions
Where we mediate
One process. Three places to have the conversation.
Choose your setting
Zoom
From your own home. No commute, no waiting room, coffee in reach.
$1,695 per person
- From anywhere at home, no commute
- No driving, no waiting room
- Coffee in reach, kids logistics minimal
- Same prep, same three-hour session
- Same agreement you write together
The setting changes. The process doesn’t. Same mediators, same preparation, same agreement you write together in your own words, same flat fee known up front.
Can’t decide? Pick the one that feels right for the two of you. We can talk it through on the free call, and you can switch after.
Ryan or Kate is your mediator, in every place.
“his calm, approachable presence made a stressful situation feel less overwhelming.”
The short version
Local court, private conversation
If you live in St. Paul and you're divorcing, your case, if you file one, runs through the Ramsey County courts. The decisions themselves don't have to.
Mediation is a private, structured conversation. A neutral mediator runs it; the two of you make the decisions. Nobody is anyone's lawyer, and nobody hands down a ruling.
With us, that means a private call with each of you, a written intake, then a joint session on Zoom. You can do it from home in Highland Park, a spare room in Roseville, or two different apartments across the river.
When you're done, your decisions are in writing. Getting them into court paperwork is a separate step that you, or an attorney if you hire one, take care of.
How it works
From first call to written decisions
The same steps for every couple, so nobody walks in cold.
How long it takes depends on how quickly you both finish the private calls and the intake, and on scheduling. The court side runs on the court's calendar.
- 115 minutes, free
A free call to see if it fits
Either of you can book it on your own. Ask anything about how mediation works with us. - 2One-on-one
A private call with each of you
Separately, before anything joint, so each of you can say what matters most without the other in the room. - 3Written intake
You each fill in the intake
Finances, accounts, debts, the house and the kids' schedules. The process guide covers what to gather. - 4On Zoom
The joint mediation session
Both of you and one neutral mediator, working from an agenda built on your intake. Or in person: a St. Paul-area conference room, or a rented cabin outside the Cities. - 5In writing
A written summary of your decisions
What the two of you agreed to, in writing, for each of you to review with your own attorney if you choose. - 6Ramsey County
The court step, which is separate
Turning decisions into court paperwork and filing it isn't part of mediation. Some couples use an attorney; others use the courts' Self-Help Centers.
Ramsey County court basics
How the court side works, in general
General information, read at the source. How it applies to your case is a question for the court or a licensed Minnesota attorney.
Where you file
ADR once a case is open
Early neutral evaluation
If you have kids
Forms and court information
More on Ramsey County
Your mediators
Ryan or Kate McLaughlin
Your mediator is neutral: no sides, no verdicts, no legal advice. The job is to keep the conversation structured and fair, so the two of you can reach your own agreement.
Ryan McLaughlin
Mediator and founder. Ryan serves couples virtually in all 50 states plus DC. He doesn't practice law or give legal advice.
Kate McLaughlin
Kate is a mediator and a Qualified Neutral under Rule 114 of the Minnesota General Rules of Practice.
Near St. Paul
St. Paul, Ramsey County and the east metro
Sessions are on Zoom, so it doesn't matter which side of the river you're on, or whether the two of you now live in different towns.
- Roseville
- Maplewood
- Shoreview
- Eagan
- Minneapolis
- White Bear Lake
- West St. Paul
- South St. Paul
- Woodbury
Parenting schedules
The house
Money and debts
How you'll communicate
Contact
Flannel People Mediation · 971 Sibley Memorial Hwy, St Paul, MN 55118 · (763) 316-8323 · flannelpeoplemediation@gmail.com
“My ex and I were looking for some help to resolve a stalemate, Ryan was fantastic. Balanced and fair. He helped us virtually (though it did feel cosy and connected) and we were able to come to a resolution and steps forward that will only strengthen our co-parenting.”
“Ryan was incredibly thoughtful and took time to truly listen to both our perspectives. His approach made the entire process feel fair and constructive.”
“Ryan is helpful and gave good direction. Definitely kept things neutral and positive during this not so fun time.”
Mediation with us
What mediation looks like at Flannel People
We help two people work through the hard issues, reach agreement and put it in writing. We don't give legal advice or deal with courts. Here's how it works with us, in St. Paul or anywhere else.
$1,695 per person
Flat, on Zoom: the private calls, the intake and the joint session. Cost breakdown.
Ryan or Kate
Your mediator is Ryan or Kate McLaughlin. Neutral, no sides, no verdicts. Meet us.
All 50 states + DC
Ryan serves couples virtually in all 50 states plus DC. Online mediation.
AI translation
Available if English isn't one spouse's first language. Sessions are conducted in English.
In person?
A St. Paul-area conference room ($1,995 per person) or a rented cabin outside the Cities ($2,495 per person). See all three places.
Safety
When a joint session isn't safe
If there's abuse, threats or coercion, sitting down together may not be safe. We talk with each person privately before any joint session, and either person can stop at any time.
If you are in danger, call 911.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233. In Minnesota, the Day One crisis line is 1-866-223-1111.
FAQ
St. Paul divorce mediation: FAQ
Educational information only, not legal advice. Flannel People Mediation provides mediation services and does not provide legal representation.
Do you work with divorcing couples in St. Paul?
Yes. We work with couples in St. Paul, across Ramsey County and the east metro, and anywhere else in Minnesota. Sessions are on Zoom, so neither of you has to drive across town or sit in a waiting room. In person, we book a comfortable conference room in the St. Paul area ($1,995 per person), or a rented cabin outside the Cities for the full day ($2,495 per person).
How much does divorce mediation cost with you?
$1,695 per person, flat, on Zoom. In person, it's $1,995 per person in a St. Paul-area conference room, or $2,495 per person at a rented cabin outside the Cities. Same process in every place. That covers the private call with each of you, the written intake, and the joint mediation session. There's no hourly billing and no retainer. Court filing fees and any attorney either of you hires are separate.
Is mediation required for a divorce in Ramsey County?
Not before you file. Once a family case is open in district court, Minnesota General Rule of Practice 310.01 makes family law matters subject to alternative dispute resolution, with exceptions such as Domestic Abuse Act cases. Mediation is one option; Ramsey County also uses early neutral evaluation. How the rules apply to your case is a question for the court or your own attorney.
Can we mediate before anything is filed?
Yes. Private mediation can happen before a case is filed, while a case is open, or after a decree. Some couples like to work out the parenting schedule and the money first, then take care of the court paperwork.
Who will our mediator be?
Ryan McLaughlin or Kate McLaughlin. Kate is a Qualified Neutral under Rule 114 of the Minnesota General Rules of Practice. Ryan is a mediator; he doesn't practice law or give legal advice. Either way, your mediator is neutral and doesn't take sides.
Do you file the divorce papers or give legal advice?
No. Flannel People Mediation provides mediation only. We don't give legal advice, draft court papers or file anything with a court. The Minnesota Judicial Branch's Self-Help Centers offer legal information and court forms, and a licensed Minnesota attorney can advise you on your own situation.
Which areas near St. Paul do you serve?
All of St. Paul and the communities around it, including Roseville, Maplewood, Shoreview, White Bear Lake, West St. Paul, South St. Paul, Woodbury and Eagan, plus Minneapolis and the rest of Minnesota. Because sessions are on Zoom, where you live in the metro doesn't change anything.
What if English isn't one spouse's first language?
AI translation is available. Sessions are conducted in English.
Sources we checked
Read November 1, 2026. General information about Minnesota courts, not legal advice about your case.
- 01Minnesota Judicial Branch: DivorceResidency and where to file.
- 02Minn. Gen. R. Prac. 310 (ADR in family cases)Family law matters are subject to ADR, with exceptions.
- 03Minnesota Judicial Branch: Ramsey County ENE / ECMEarly neutral evaluation in the Second Judicial District.
- 04Minnesota ADR (Rule 114) rosterThe public roster of Qualified Neutrals.
- 05Minn. Stat. § 518.157Parent education and notice of the option of private mediation.
- 06Minnesota Judicial Branch: Self-Help CentersCourt forms and legal information for self-represented parties.
Keep reading
- Divorce mediation in MinnesotaHow it works statewide, what it costs and how long it takes.
- Ramsey County divorce mediationCounty fees, courthouse and case steps.
- Child custody mediation in MinnesotaBuilding a parenting plan the two of you agree on.
- Online mediationWhat mediating on Zoom is actually like.
The free call
Pick a time. 15 minutes.
Come alone or together. Ask what you want to know about mediation with us. You don't agree to anything on the call.
Loading scheduler...
Next step
Talk it through first
A free 15-minute call to hear how mediation works with us and whether it fits. 4.9 stars, 292 Google reviews.